Bush's funny speeches
He is not only a president, he is also funny.
5) "There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me
— you can't get fooled again." —Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002
4) "I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."
—Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000
3) "They misunderestimated me." —Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000
2) "Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?"
—Florence, S.C., Jan. 11, 2000
1) "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."
—Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004
I just found out some more unintentionally funny speeches.
If you don't stand for anything, you don't stand for anything!
- Nov 2, 2000 at Bellevue Community College
I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family
- Jan 27, 2000 in New Hampshire
Will the highways on the Internet become more few?
- Concord, New Hampshire, Jan 29, 2000
If you choose to do so, when Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried and persecuted as a war criminal.
- St. Louis, Jan 22, 2003, he likely meant 'prosecuted.'
We cannot let terrorists hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile.
- 2000 in Des Moines, Iowa
he is really funny
Posted by Anonymous | 11:50 AM
He ain't nothing but funny.
Posted by Anonymous | 9:59 PM
He is old school
Posted by Anonymous | 5:21 PM
I want his babies to so there will be more laughter in the world
Posted by Anonymous | 5:55 PM
don't rude guys, anyway he is a president.
Posted by Anonymous | 6:00 PM
It's a sad day when you figure out that the leader of the free world cannot recite a twelve word long proverb.
Posted by Anonymous | 6:09 PM
we won't rude ok? your just as funny as our funny illiterate president it kind of scares me really. the "leader" of the free world cannot even read the speaches that some one else wrote for him. or else he has hired some really funny typists that just like to toy with him.
Posted by Anonymous | 6:11 PM
Forget a proverb, he can't even recite lyrics by The Who!!! "We won't get fooled again!!" Too much coke for Dubya. He's a shame and a disgrace.
Posted by Anonymous | 6:24 PM
Clod
Posted by Anonymous | 7:00 PM
We're only laughing cos we don't want to cry
Posted by Anonymous | 7:09 PM
the saying goes,
fool me once, shame on you
fool me twice, shame on me
Posted by Anonymous | 7:12 PM
Thats classic stuff...why the hell he was elected i still don't know...my 8 year old cousin speaks better english than him...seriously
Posted by Anonymous | 8:09 PM
who's stupid, ...him or those who elected and re-elected him?,
God save Europe!
Posted by Anonymous | 8:22 PM
canadians.....please please invade america
Posted by Anonymous | 8:24 PM
The worst thing is every speech is written for him and he pretty much always fucks it up
classic!
he should have his own tv show
Posted by Anonymous | 8:24 PM
No Mr. President, our children isn't learning
Posted by Anonymous | 9:13 PM
President Bush gives me hope. if HE gets to be president, so can i!
Posted by Anonymous | 9:14 PM
Heh, 2 Supreme Court Justices... majority in Congress... he could legally change the length of the presidential term to 50 years... at which point many loyal Americans would line up at the gates with various weapons. Bet he'll try it.
Posted by Anonymous | 9:36 PM
We Australians usually get a bit of a rep for being a bit slow but please America now everyone looks to u for the idiocy.
Posted by Anonymous | 10:09 PM
bush is a freak puppet of a new world order i say. moreover the world just dances along to their tune.
Posted by Anonymous | 10:48 PM
A puppet,thats all he is....
Posted by Anonymous | 12:11 AM
True, a puppet. But whatever happened to the quality we used to see with Jim Henson? Now those were some believable puppets.
Ever look at Bush's face after he's done saying something...? He appears that he's just said the most PROFOUND and wonderful thing that any man has ever said. Ever.
A sad, sad place we are in.
Posted by Anonymous | 12:21 AM
If America's President is that DUMB, just image how the people are that voted him in are!?!
Now that's a scary though.
Posted by Anonymous | 12:45 AM
DUMB nation, oops I meant DAMN nation. ;)
Posted by Anonymous | 12:47 AM
We are not all dum. For god sake we voted him in to power, he is a humble man, he just acts that way in front millions of people, how will you behave when in pressure? Proud to be an American.
Posted by Anonymous | 12:52 AM
Yeah I'm an American. But I hate our president. I think its sad that the people who didn't vote have to put up with him. And its only because of who his dad is. Not all American's are dumb. At least the people who didn't vote for him are
Posted by Anonymous | 1:52 AM
Elect me once... shame on me
Elect me twice... shame on you!!!!
Posted by Anonymous | 2:35 AM
bush has always been stupid so to the ppl who write him the speech and all. Maybe that is y USA is still surviving. Maybe that is y USA depends on Dumb ppl like MR BUSH and horny ppl Like Mr Clinton
Posted by Anonymous | 2:48 AM
Why do people blame me for his idoicy? I didn't voyte for him, and I encouraged every single person i met not to do it. I find it sad that people are blaming all americans for bush, when it's not everyone. I know MOST of us are stupid, but give the rest some credit, please.
Posted by Anonymous | 2:48 AM
americans r funny people.....
when they want to elect a president, they get two opttions.....
when they want to elect a Ms. America, they get 50
Posted by Anonymous | 2:56 AM
what a tit
Posted by Anonymous | 2:56 AM
He is trying to make every american so illiterate so that he can make them to vote for him. But seeing the same results twice probably means that americans are already illiterate.Yeah i know that the truth hurts but...........
Posted by Anonymous | 3:35 AM
bush is a TIT...
please before claiming he is illeaterate, re-read your posts and make sure they are proper english, or at least have no spelling mistakes
Posted by Anonymous | 3:46 AM
i can honestly say with all my being that bush was not elected legally either time.
you may go "wait. that's not right. it was all over the news! he won fair and square."
Fuck you. he robbed florida of votes in 2000 and ohio and new mexico of votes in 2004.
he has no mandate. he wasn't chosen by the people.
not all of us americans are morons. granted, there are a lot of us that are, but public opinion isn't actual public opinion. america is controlled by "perception managers" like the rendon group, who aid the government in psychological warfare on their own people.
the government, with their defense contracts with corporate american companies (who also own the mainstream media outlets--all of whom get their "news" from american press--who gets their "news" from government officials) begin wars to create revenue for the "war machine."
companies like GE, Lockheed-Martin, etc. all profit from wars. just like this mess in Iraq. now, we finally hear through mainstream channels about cheney meeting with oil companies in 2001, only for them to increase profits steadily for the past 4 years.
thanks to bush and his cronies, the big agenda is getting put into effect by the quickest means. false terrorist attacks, media fright frenzies, and unconstitutional legislation that limits civil rights---all are part of a big plan.
wake up, people.
there is no electoral system in america. kerry was a patsy. he rolled over and died on PURPOSE. he ran to get the democratic vote, thus being the democratic candidate only to take a dive so that bush would win.
bush sr. was director of the cia--experts in RIGGING ELECTIONS.
pull your heads out of your asses. if you can't see who's stealing from you, and who's about to royally fuck you over, then you deserve what you get.
the rest of us, however, will be sure not to give up our guns.
Posted by Anonymous | 3:50 AM
* associated press (not american press)
Posted by Anonymous | 3:52 AM
dubya is da bomb
Posted by Anonymous | 5:18 AM
This list of above bushisms is missing my favorite:
"Its clearly a budget. Its got a lot of numbers in it."
I have a whole list of good ones. Just the fact alone that Bush has said enough "bushisms" that there is a far side style calendar out there with a different one for each day makes me laugh pretty hard. And then it also makes me really mad at the people who voted for bush because they didn't want ted and fred to get married in MA, or because they want to be able to tell women what they can and can't do with their bodies. Thanx for completely missing the major issues our country was dealing with at the time...
Posted by Anonymous | 5:50 AM
very nice, i agree totaly ( Posted by Anonymous | 3:46 AM )
Posted by Anonymous | 6:18 AM
This is sad, our President cannot even speak clearly and we have the nerve to invade another country. We as a nation are in serious crap, not to mention our President's mouth!
Posted by Anonymous | 5:14 PM
A lot of people misunderestimated the man who said global warming does not exist during a presidential debate.
Posted by Anonymous | 8:04 PM
As a proud Canadian, I wish we had the ability to invade the US and find you a better president because you all can't stop from voting the dude in! But of course our military is pretty pathetic because we are more worried about taking care of our own people! Weird concept, huh? At least Bill Clinton was more worried about having a good time while he was in office than invading other countries for oil, and as a fun extra, justice. Maybe you should vote a better president in the next term, wouldn't have these problems. :)
Posted by Anonymous | 12:04 AM
look at this puppet monkey right here, i think rice should send him to kindergarden and let the big boys handle the political stuff, i feel bad for you americans, i do..
we here in norway often sit and laugh and discuss the dumbness of this wanker...
heads up you redneck son of a bitches, can't you see this guy is ruining you country?
and that accident i the gulf could have been avoided if this so called president had done something about the dams a few years back...
siriously, buck up people, buck up!
Posted by Anonymous | 12:23 AM
That dude keeps talking the crap
Posted by Anonymous | 12:48 AM
"It's a sad day when you figure out that the leader of the free world cannot recite a twelve word long proverb.
Posted by Vroden | 6:09 PM "
'The' free world? He isn't the leader of Europe or Canada, you know!
Posted by Anonymous | 3:10 AM
Wow.. I knew when I heard that They think of ways to harm our country and people, and so do we speech, it was real messed up. You can even see Dick Cheney flinch when Bush says it, anyone go it on tape :) Yes, folks,. Bush needs to get a speech write puppet master to fit in with the oil giant puppet master, the war machine puppet master, and the corporate greed puppet master.
Posted by Anonymous | 9:04 AM
And my teachers told me mediocracy will only get you so far in life!
http://impeachthepresident.blogspot.com
Posted by Anonymous | 3:46 AM
Bush is not funny at all his jokes stink!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by Anonymous | 10:14 AM